Exposing Our Toxic Roots

Toxic Roots

 My parents splitting seemed to be the worst thing that could happen as an 11 year old. It left a hole in my heart that made me think I'd be complete if I made my own happy family one day. 

My dream became reality, but within a few years, so did my nightmare. The things I feared happened in my own marriage. Familiar emotions from childhood resurfaced for a reason. They were meant to be healed.
Our mental root systems have been influenced by our early environments at home. Our family of origin was the soil that had toxicity before we came along. The root system grew dysfunctional for years.  
So for me to heal, I had to learn to trust a God I couldn't see. His ways are not our ways. As I surrendered my control to a loving God, the stronger I became. It took many years to learn where I end and God begins. We all have to work with the soil we were planted in. 

Craving Intimacy (IN-TO- ME -SEE)

We were created to experience intimate connections and belong. Why were some of us drawn to people that may eventually hurt us? Could there have been an underlying attraction overlooked in the beginning? Did our dreams for a happy future develop out of fear and lack of love? Overcoming the toxic relationship requires examining what got us there in first place. Our relationships have something to teach us about our emotional self, our true essence and the incomplete child within.

Dysfunctional relationships are built on shaky foundations and by incomplete people. The poor choices of our ancestors left the family soil toxic in need of redemption. It allows decay which continues to plague us and our kids. Unless someone in the family line breaks the cycle, there remains a propensity for familiar vices. The mental maps created from childhood are very difficult to redesign without guidance and love. It takes conscious effort, humility, and healthy core beliefs to re-map our thoughts, memories and maladaptive beliefs.

Renewing the Mind Through Perfect Love

It is necessary to examine our own foundations before looking at the problems in a present relationship. For me, understanding my emotional programming, combined with the truth of life-replenishing scriptures, I was able to replace the lies with truth. The truth that I was worthy to be loved by the perfect Lover of my soul. 

Regardless of our age, it is important to consider the child within. We all still have some growing up to do, but will our adult ego cooperate with a higher and more trustworthy authority than our imperfect parents? Are we still teachable enough to grow in spiritual and emotional intimacy? Are we willing to see where we were wrong? Or are we as children who want it our way and in our time?

        
God has a plan for us that‘s better than the one we have for ourselves. Unsuccessful relationships can challenge us to explore our emotional and spiritual lives. Most of us don’t realize how valuable we are to God. His love is perfect. He knows right where we hurt. If we accept His love in our hearts and become willing to get Him involved, we become His adopted children. 

Grafted into Love 

God is our perfect loving parent. Like any other meaningful relationship, you’ll have to get to know His true character. Study scriptures that speak of His ways. You will learn He never leaves or forsakes us.  He gave us a comforter to abide in us and gives us strength when we are weak. As we surrender to His ways, grace replaces our need for control. Fear is replaced by love as we learn to trust again. " I am the vine, you are the branches..."John 15:5

His Spirit carries the burdens of what we cannot control. We become dependent on Him. We cannot learn this love on our own with out intimate relationship with Him. because “that which is born of the flesh is flesh and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit” (John 3:6 ESV). This higher love must be received in true faith, experienced and expressed within us by the Holy Spirit whom God sent to us.

“And I will ask the Father and He will give you another helper to be with you forever, even the spirit of truth whom the world cannot receive because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him for he dwells in you and will be with you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.” John 14:16-18 ESV

Fertilize the Soil with Scripture and Good Fostering

The bible contains truth, power and authority and can activate His promises in your life. They will help redeem what was lost, leading you to your spiritual inheritance which belong to you as His kid. Anyone who believes and trusts in them will gain wisdom, healing, strength and fulfillment through grace, the power of God’s Holy Spirit working with us. 

God wants to foster your heart and life as you trust Him in faith in your adopted essence. Seek people that will guide you and love you. Consistent reading and fellowship will accelerate the spiritual laws of attraction. Expect to see miracles, divine connections, deeper revelations and confirmation of His hand at work in your life. Your relationship with God will help define the deeper part of you, your spirit, your recovering essence. Learn to become whole as person, and bloom into the creation you were designed to be.

I'd love the opportunity to shorten your journey to your Promised Land and live fully engaged within your Recovered Essence.

“Looking unto Jesus, the Author and the Finisher of our faith.” Hebrews 12:2 KJV

Contact Christine for Life Coaching or more information on The Recovered Essence Program

Recover Your True Essence

Coming out of the Cocoon

I didn't know I wasn't authentic. It was a way of life; pretending I was something I wasn't. If you thought you knew me, I'm sorry I wasn't being honest with you or myself. I’m letting you know that I’m finally coming out with my true identity. I’m not who you thought I was, in fact I’m not who I used to think I was. I’ve been recovering my true essence after a long season of transformation. I have a more secure identity, as I've been rooted and grounded in God's love.

Starting at 38 years old, a deeper truth was unveiled to me and I finally got it. I had opened a part of my heart to live out my God given essence of who I really am. I received God's mercy in a way I never realized I needed. I was too busy proving to myself I was fine. But that image finally crashed. As I tried to put the pieces back together, I began to believe in my heart that I am loved and valued by God. That changed everything.

Truth Exposes Lies

After a failed marriage, betrayed and abused by a husband and feeling forsaken by God Himself, I succumbed to those familiar shame-based beliefs about my worth. I had been seeking to create my own family life from the broken foundation of my own childhood home at 11 years old, (that's me on the book cover at 2 years old.) But when my own marriage fell apart, I was forced to re-evaluate some beliefs that brought me to the end of myself.

It all happened the way it did for a good reason. It gave God something to work with as I finally learned to let Him. Just as a loving earthy Father would guide his child, I had to learn to trust Him. This was a new kind of relationship for me, different from my earthy parents and unfamiliar to my previous ways of finding value. In doing so, I found out not only who I wasn’t but who I was. That’s the basis of Recovered Essence.

The Seed of Perfection 

In this book, I used my own story as a timeline to address some unhealthy beliefs and thoughts that prevent us from becoming who God created us to be. I love to help others expose the lies which hinder them from living their best life possible.

Inside our hearts is a divine seed of perfection that yearns for the perfect love mankind had in the first garden. Life has a way of stealing from that perfect seed by the lies culture feeds us. Finding our true essence is about nourishing that seed to life with the wisdom and power of perfect love. Choosing faith (which is to trust the truth of God's word) is what waters the seed. 

Seeds grow when planted in good soil. It's our past perceptions that poison our soul. It takes a conscious unlearning of all that was wrong and allowing our hearts to grow again. Many of us neglected our very essence because of the cares of this world, past pain and distractions in life.

Imagine having a perfect upbringing, knowing perfect truth, not bound culture by moral relativism. Imagine if you were guided through life, perfectly and uniquely nurtured by love. Imagine as a child being taught relevant scriptures, customized to your maturing identity. Imagine having courage and security, without any fear of rejection. Having been grounded and secured in love, it would overflow to others. You would give out of the abundance of what you were given. That’s the seed that if nourished, would cause the real you to come to fullness and completion.

Scripture states in Ephesians 3:17-19:

... so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.…

So when that seed of divine impartation dwells in you, and you nurture it through an intimate relationship with the very One who created it, it’s only a matter of time before the fullness of that seed begins to flourish in you. Christ in you is that love. His love as the very thing your soul has longed for and it changes the very paradigm on which your life centers on.

Fully You is to be Filled with Him

It’s what Jesus meant when He said;

I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. John 15:5

So if you would like to learn more, especially if a toxic relationship has interrupted the process of finding your true self, I wrote this book for you. You are not alone and you are worthy of a love like you have never known, far beyond your own understanding. Come and experience this love and let it nurture you back to life. 

To receive your copy:

http://www.amazon.com/Recovered-Essence-Toxic-Relationships-Impact-ebook/dp/B010RK33AQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1440000031&sr=8-1&keywords=recovered+essence

For more information on my Life Coaching Services and other products visit my website at:

Recoveredessence.com 

© Christine Wilson Recover Your True Essence 2015

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Christine Wilson and Recovered Essence Book Launch with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.